Honeymoon For One Read online

  Honeymoon For One

  By Lily Zante

  PUBLISHED BY:

  Lily Zante

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this publication may be copied, reproduced in any format, by any means, electronic or otherwise, without prior consent from the copyright owner and publisher of this book.

  The scanning, uploading and distribution of this book through the internet or any other means without the prior written consent of the author is illegal and is punishable by law.

  This is a work of fiction. All characters, names, places and events are the product of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously and do not bear any resemblance to any real person, alive or dead.

  Copyright © 2012

  www.LilyZante.com

  Table of Contents

  Honeymoon For One

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Booklist

  Chapter 1

  Ava lay on the couch wiping her raw nose again. Her head throbbed with shooting pain and she wanted to close her eyes and drift off to sleep, but she couldn’t. Damn this flu.

  But Connor would be here soon. Wincing in pain, she blew her nose yet again and sank back onto the couch, dragging the chenille blanket up to her neck. Swatches of peach colored organza and pale pink silk fabric lay on the other side, at her feet. As soon as her mind had cleared enough she would choose one fabric and this would signal the start of the wedding favors sub-project. For now she was too congested to think straight.

  Wearily she grabbed the television control. When Harry Met Sally was on and she flicked back and forth between live coverage of the New Year’s Eve celebrations in Times Square and the romantic film she had seen countless times. It was 11.14pm.

  Connor would be here soon. What was keeping him so long?

  The loud cheers on the television woke her up. The Robitussin had done its job and she had managed to slip into a delicious sleep. Ava shook her head not quite believing the clock on the television screen. It was midnight already. A digital counter in one corner of the screen counted down, “10, 9…..8….7…”

  No Connor anywhere.

  She grabbed her cell and called him, her heart racing with thoughts of anything and everything that could have gone wrong.

  Dear god, not now.

  “5…..4”

  “Connor? Where are you? I’ve been worried sick.” A part of her was relieved to hear his voice again and to know that he was alright and another part of her was angry that he wasn’t by her side on this special night.

  “3…2…1….Happy New Year everybody!” The crowds went berserk in the main square and New Year’s Eve confetti rained down from the skies.

  It was here. The New Year had finally arrived. And the wedding was only six weeks away. A burst of happiness exploded through her, wiping out the worry she had felt when Connor hadn’t turned up.

  “Happy New Year Darling.” She smiled as she said it, even though her head hurt and her throat felt as though it had been sandpapered.

  There was a pause at the other end.

  “I can’t do it Ava. I’m sorry.” Connor sounded dull and quiet even though in the background she could hear everyone at Russell’s house party screaming and hooting for joy.

  She blinked in confusion. Had she heard him right? Maybe the Robitussen was playing tricks on her.

  “Can’t do what Connor?” she asked in a muffled voice, as she wiped her nose with a soggy Kleenex.

  “I can’t marry you. I’m sorry. I can’t go through with it.” His words cut her more than her throbbing headache or throat.

  “What? Connor?” What did you just say?

  “I’m sorry, I can’t go through with the wedding. I don’t think I love you.”

  She had heard him the first time.

  I don’t think I love you.

  From deep inside her, she managed to find the strength to say, “I know,” before hanging up. She felt her body shaking all over, except that it didn’t really feel as though she was inside it. The next moment she collapsed backwards onto the couch and let out a gut wrenching scream, flinging her arms out and sending the swatches of organza and silk fabric hovering delicately to the floor. She heard a primal, guttural sound ringing in the air and it took her a few seconds to figure out that it was her voice.

  I don’t think I love you.

  But the wedding was no more than six weeks away.

  On the television, the crowds were hugged and kissed each other and the euphoric party goers were all smiles and laughter. They had high hopes for this brand new start to a brand new year. Sick at the sight of so much happiness, Ava smacked the television off and then curled up into a ball and hid herself completely beneath the soft comfort of the blanket.

  A short while later Ava woke up and found herself staring at the ceiling. She had dozed off with the light on and even now, hovering on the edge of sleep and wakefulness, the first words she remembered were Connor’s.

  I don’t think I love you.

  What surprised her more than what he had said, was her response. She realised with a start that she hadn’t been totally surprised to hear these words, not really; not if she was being completely honest with herself.

  In fact, thinking about the past few months and the constant rows they had had to do with the wedding preparations, she wasn’t surprised at all. Because even though they had been together for nearly three years, Ava felt the two of them had started drifting apart during the last six months. These had been defining times for their relationship and deep in her very core, her soul had known that it wasn’t right. She had seen Connor becoming something that he had never been since she had known him: distant. And the distance had increased the closer the wedding date loomed. Now with only six weeks to go, it was no wonder Connor couldn’t have kept the pretense up for any longer.

  Ava blew her nose again and briefly wondered whether she should get up and move into her bedroom. But she couldn’t summon the willpower to move her body. Instead, she closed her eyes. She would worry about tomorrow when she woke up.

  Chapter 2

  The next morning Ava woke up in an awkward position with a dull ache on the left side of her body. She had slept badly and awkwardly on the couch and this morning she was paying the price for neglecting her bed.

  She sat up on the couch and reached over to the floor to get her cell phone. Everything she needed was on there. She always checked her emails, messages , calendar and to-do list for the day before taking a single step out of bed. And sure enough this morning there was an email from Connor.

  Coward. She noted the time of the email; he had sent it at a quarter to four in the morning.

  Dear Ava

  I’m so sorry I broke the news to you as I did yesterday, just on the stroke of midnight and you deserve better than that. I’m sorry.

  I don’t feel I can carry on. I think I love you, but sometimes I’m not sure I do. The thought of marriage scares the hell out of me. I’m not sure I’m the marrying type. Everything was great between us. But as you got more carried away with everything for the big day, I got more and more frightened by the sense of responsibility. You talked about babies and I’m still thinking about my career. Babies weren’t in my career plan. But they are in yours. I can’t
take that away from you.

  It wasn’t just that. I knew I couldn’t go through with the wedding and I owe it to you to tell you this. That weekend I told you I went to a law seminar in Connecticut. I did. But I also ended up sleeping with a woman I met from another law firm. I knew then, that if I was capable of that, the one thing I wasn’t going to do was to let you think marriage to me was the way forward. I hope you’ll find it in your heart to forgive me one day.

  Connor.

  So it hadn’t been a dream after all.

  She dropped the cell phone on the floor and buried her face in her hands. But the tears did not come. The course of her whole life ahead had been changed. But why did she feel a tiny sense of relief?

  With a sinking heart she realised that her mother had invited the two of them over for a late lunch today. Her mother had also invited her other daughter, her son-in-law and of course, little Tori would be there too.

  The thought of seeing her closest family and breaking this news to them filled her with dread. But she had to start sometime and she would tell them first.

  Elsa Ramirez lived alone in Cherry Creek, a small suburb within the Denver city limits. She had invited her daughter and future son-in-law over for lunch on New Year’s Day.

  A widowed woman, in her late sixties, Elsa was a social butterfly with a very busy social life. Yet she always made time to see her two daughters, Ava and Rona. She wasn’t too worried about Rona. Her husband Carlos looked after her well and she was busy enjoying life as a new mother to six month old Tori. It was Ava that she was more concerned about. This wedding was taking its toll on her daughter, she could see that. Her daughter was busy enough as it was, what with her copywriting assignments and her online store which was taking up more of her time and now the wedding preparations had taken over.

  Each day she hoped the final arrangements for the wedding were drawing near but each time her perfectionist daughter was going the extra mile doing everything to make the big day extra special. The wedding preparations were never ending.

  Elsa sniffed her nose in annoyance as she peeled the potatoes and diced the cabbage, checking the ham steak every now and then.

  She would put up with Connor for the sake of her daughter but, thought Elsa, ferociously dicing the cabbage for the sauerkraut, she didn’t feel completely at ease around him. Not that it would matter now. She would have to keep her mouth shut because Ava was happy and that was all that mattered. Still, she would keep her eyes open for any signs that Connor was making her sad. She sensed that her daughter always tried to live up to what she perceived to be Connor’s ideals. His family was rich and he came from a long line of lawyers. Elsa had met Connor’s parents once. Cold smiles and eyes that gave away no expression. They smiled politely at her and it was clear that they had met and liked Ava on a number of occasions. But Elsa wasn’t convinced that his parents thought Ava was good enough stock for their son.

  With six weeks to go to the wedding day, Elsa hoped everything would go according to plan. She prayed her daughter would be happy and that her future son-in-law would be worthy of her.

  She opened the oven door and looked at the ham steak. It looked just perfect.

  The ham steak was cooked to perfection and on a normal day Ava would have had a second helping. As it was, she was having problems getting down her first portion down.

  When she couldn’t stand it any longer, she put down her cutlery and looked for the right time to do it.

  “I have something to say,” she announced. She could feel her heart thumping away and the back of her throat pulsating as her mother and sister looked up sharply from their food. Carlos chewed impassively and only a sharp dig in the ribs from Rona made him sit up and pay attention.

  “The wedding’s off,” said Ava flatly.

  Carlos stopped chewing for a few seconds. Rona said, “What?” then “Are you sure?”

  Only her mother remained silent. Ava felt her mother’s stare penetrating her soul.

  “What? Why?” repeated Rona, putting down her napkin. Beside her, Carlos’s fork slipped and landed on his plate with a nervous clatter.

  “He says he can’t go through with it and that he’s sorry,” said Ava. She stared at them all with her gray-blue eyes, that now showed signs of a tearful night.

  She swallowed some water. Her throat was parched and although her fever had gone, she now felt her face getting hot again. The dark circles under her eyes gave her face a sunken appearance. In the background, they heard the stirring noises of a baby’s cry. Spellbound, Rona ignored it. “B-B-but the wedding’s six weeks away!” Rona gasped.

  “Why’d it take him so long to realize? Its probably just his nerves. A lot of men go through that,” she suggested hopefully.

  “Carlos didn’t,” said Ava, playing with her food.

  “I wouldn’t dare,” Carlos muttered under his breath.

  Tori’s crying turned louder still.

  “Will you go and check on the baby for chrissakes!” hissed Rona. Reluctantly, Carlos put down his fork and got up.

  Elsa watched her daughter carefully. She looked tired, drained and her beautiful face seemed thinner than she had ever seen. She could tell that Ava was deliberately avoiding her gaze.

  “Are you sure this is final, Ava?” Elsa asked, reaching out her hand and clasping her daughters in hers.

  At no time since he had jilted her, had Ava felt as sad as she did now. It was the love and concern of her immediate family that saddened her. “He said he’s not the marrying type, mom. He said wedding talk scared him. It scared him so much he slept with another woman a few weeks ago.”

  Elsa put her hand to her mouth.

  Rona and Carlos gasped together.

  And the baby started crying louder than ever.

  “Better that you found out now, my love,” said Elsa, squeezing her daughter’s hand even tighter.

  Rona got up to take the baby from Carlos then walked over to Ava, with Tori balanced precariously on her hip, and gave Ava a kiss on the head.

  “He obviously doesn’t deserve you.”

  Sisters would say that, thought Ava miserably. The truth of it was that she missed Connor. He should have been sitting here beside her. He should have been a part of this family meal. He would have been joining her family and soon they would have been a married couple. But now all of those dreams had disappeared.

  “Are you sure it’s not just a misunderstanding Ava? Something about him getting cold feet? Can this be sorted out?”

  Ava shook her head. No. There was nothing to be sorted out here. It had happened and perhaps it had happened for the best.

  It wasn’t that Connor was getting cold feet now. It was just that his feet had never been firmly there in the first place.

  Chapter 3

  It was Valentines Day and it should have been Ava’s wedding day. Instead Rona had come over with Tori, helping Ava to clear up her apartment. Neither her mother nor her sister had wanted Ava to spend the day alone.

  But what Rona didn’t know was that Ava had been busy packing for her solo honeymoon.

  Ever since Connor had left her, Ava bad busied herself with wedding preparations once more, except that this time she was busy cancelling everything that she had spent the past year organizing. All the suppliers, dressmakers, caterers and party planners had been informed and all the money had been refunded, minus the cancellation costs.

  When Rona had come over this morning with Tori, the two women had gone through the last few things that needed to be dealt with. But then only half an hour since arriving Tori started crying and Ava needed to clear her head. She had gone for a five mile run and now that she had returned, her head was clearer and she decided it was the right time to tell Rona of her decision.

  “You’re doing what? Tell me, did I hear it wrong or what?” cried Rona aghast. Baby Tori was spitting drool all over her shoulder, as Rona faced Ava with the baby on one hip and performing a fine balancing act.

  “I’m going on
the honeymoon,” countered Ava, as she sauntered around the room in her tracksuit pants. Her hair was untidily thrown up into a high ponytail and the sweat from her run left a shiny trail on her face.

  “But we’ve been cancelling everything for the past few weeks!” cried Rona in consternation.

  “Wrong,” said Ava, “You’ve been cancelling the hotel, the caterers and telling people. I’ve been dealing with the honeymoon and wedding dresses.”

  “And you didn’t cancel the honeymoon?” said Rona slowly, looking at her younger sister in utter bewilderment. “Let me guess. Mom knows about this too, right?” Ava nodded her head, unable to stop herself from bursting out laughing, seeing the look of horror on her sister’s face.

  “And, wait, wait,” said Rona, drool staining her yellow t-shirt as she walked around with a yellow muslin square in her hand. “Mom’s all for it, isn’t she?”

  “Yes indeed. She thinks it’s the best thing for me,” said Ava. She sat on the floor untying her shoe laces. She remembered her mother’s reaction when she told her what she was planning on doing.

  “Go Ava, go and enjoy yourself and forget all about this mess here. Sometimes things look bleak just before you hit the peaks. Go.”

  Her mother had been instrumental in helping Ava get over the shock of what Connor had done. Yet she had always had a feeling that her mother was not really too fond of Connor. She sighed with a big smile on her face as she looked up at her sister who was stood before her still perplexed.

  “Let me get this straight. We both cancelled all things wedding related. I mean, that’s what we’ve been doing the past month, right?” asked Rona, wiping Tori’s face.

  Ava nodded.

  “And now you tell me that everything is done, cancelled, finished, ended, except the honeymoon?” The muslin square was flying furiously in her hand as she gesticulated at full speed, using her hands for exaggeration.